In the history of our culture, what is considered “sexy” has never been completely straightforward. While girls with attractive figures and pretty faces are sure to entice, there are many other qualities that can lead to someone being seen as “sexy”. In the short film If These Walls Could Talk II and the essay “Butch-Femme Relationships: Sexual Courage in the 1950s” by Joan Nestle, the butch flesbians are shown to be sexy for a plethora of different reasons, including their rock solid confidence.

The minute the four friends pushed open that door, they knew something was different about these women. A certain female machismo clung onto the air in a somewhat unapologetic fashion. This unabashed self-assurance contended with the four friends’ sense of self. In a similar fashion, lesbian feminists of the ‘80s didn’t take too kindly to the role ‘butch’ lesbians portrayed in the ‘50s; fearing that their existence would color all lesbians as the same. Both the short film, If These Walls Could Talk II, and the essay, “Butch-Femme Relationships: Sexual Courage in the 1950s,” similarly characterize the “butch” woman as the outsider through their use of differing social contexts. In Joan Nestle’s essay, we see lesbian feminists reject the “butch” for falling in line with heteronormative social standards comparatively to how Linda’s friends reject Amy for not assimilating to their standards of homonormativity in the film. However, born out of her resistance to these social pressures the “butch” cultivates her own sexiness that is reflected in her presentation of self through her assuredness, confidence and compassion.

Firstly, confidence is in how you stand, not in how you look. In the scene in If These Walls Could Talk II when Linda brings her new butch girlfriend Amy to her house to meet her friends, Linda’s friends mock Amy’s appearance and force her to put on a feminine shirt. It’s likely that Linda’s friends felt jealous of Amy due to the fact that she was completely open about who she was, not caring about what others thought of her. After, Amy stands her ground and leaves, because dressing in masculine clothing is how she feels comfortable, and nothing can change who she is. She doesn’t want to lose who she is as a person just to fit in, which speaks to her confidence.  Amy never loses her moxie, and this is what attracts Linda to her.

Furthermore, butch lesbians have a confidence that intimidates all types of people, including lesbians themselves. In her essay “Butch-Femme Relationships: Sexual Courage in the 1950s”, Joan Nestle writes, “The butch-femme couples embarrassed other Lesbians (and still does) because they made Lesbians culturally visible.” (Nestle 101) While this quote is undoubtedly true, some lesbians, like Linda from the film, find the butches being completely open about who they are very appealing. They don’t seek approval from anyone and stay true to themselves, remaining confident, making them very sexy to some.

Also, the butch women have a tough but yet caring exterior that displays a different type of sexiness. These women think more about feeling, focusing more on conversation. (likes/dislikes, hobbies, habits, friends/family, etc.) They care more about the love aspect of the whole “relationship” title. In butch-femme relationships, the passion, love, and respect come from both sides, not just one. In the scene in If These Walls Could Talk II where Linda and Amy have sex, Linda is initially tense and likely unsure of herself, until Amy reassures her and tells her to relax and enjoy it. It’s this comfort and love that the butch shows that make them so sexy to certain lesbians. Nestle echoes this in a quote from her essay, “ I went down on my lovers to catch them in my mouth and to celebrate their strength, their caring for me. Deeper than the sexual positioning was the overwhelming love I felt for their courage.” (Nestle 105) This quote truly serves to outline just why butch-femme relationships were so salubrious; the butch lesbians didn’t care about anything besides making each other feel wanted and happy.

Works Cited

If These Walls Could Talk II. Dir. Martha Coolidge. HBO Films. 2000. Film.

Nestle, Joan. “Butch-Femme Relationships: Sexual Courage in the 1950s.” In A Restricted Country. Ithaca, NY: Firebrand Books, 1987.